We went and did it
Last week we chose a boy. Our foster care worker found us a 18 month old boy who’s home situation is very unlikely to improve. There are no extended family to take him in. Dad is out of the picture (incarcerated for several years). So the mom already struggling to get by with no support, has taken a turn for the worse (mentally speaking). It is likely she loves her son, but her upbringing was so bad that she doesnt really know how to love him or parent. She has mental health issues.
These circumstances have worked so far in our favor to bring us this beautiful smiling little boy. Our girl 2 1/2 has accepted him as a playmate, but they have their moments. Our house is now filled with laughter and screams. Never a dull moment!
Meanwhile, we are working towards attachment to this little boy, either way regardless of what happens, we believe he deserves that. We want to be the best plan b parents we can be for him.
In the next few weeks his case will be brought to a judge. It is very likely the judge will rule him under permenant guardianship (adoptable after 30 days). The mom, who I’m told doesnt have a hope of getting her life together enough to keep her son. If she shows up in court to fight for him it will only prolong his time in foster care.
They will then have to give her a few months until the new court date. She is entitled to her process no matter how messed up she is. While her child lives in lymbo wondering if these people will be his new family.
Is it wrong to wish that she cant get out of bed that day? Maybe she is late for her bus? Or she is too busy with her new boyfriend to think about what day it is?
Please keep fingers, toes and eyes crossed for us. I will keep you posted. Your support is appreciated!!!